The reasons I’m going to hell.

Warning! This post makes me look thoroughly girly. I swear on my mother that I will never TyPE LyKe tHis!!! or other such atrocities. But I am female. Some things are unavoidable.

Not a top ten list, but if Letterman would like to pick up on the theme he is certainly welcome.

One: I bought today two Lacoste shirts. One was six dollars, one was eight. I also have a (fake) Louis Vuitton bag that cost something like 40 dollars and is a cute blushy shade of pink. Yes, I’m aware 40 is still a little high, but it’ll be worth it when I explain it cost 400, and I had saved up for months.

Two: Half of my waking time is dedicated to finding attractive boys, and subsequently crushing on them. I plan on following most of the rules. But the whole “No dating” thing is not priority. I won’t do drugs, and there is no way I’ll drive in this country. Maniacs. And there’s parallel parking. That would equal thousands of dollars in damage for me, and that I couldn’t afford.

Three: I look for the best in people until we actually start to get to know each other. Then I look for all the reasons I might not actually want to be around them. (Those who are still around have passed this, and don’t even know it.) It’s mean. But that’s how I trust people: I don’t, for a long time. But I do. I can’t explain yet. We’ll see.

Four: I think you can call that thing a one night stand. And I don’t regret it.

Have I belatedly turned into an actual, superficial teenager? Please don’t say yes.

Five, edited on in:  I haven’t emailed my dad, almost a week after he sent a birthday greeting.  I still don’t know if I want to.